Nearly all of the corporate executives who attended our survival course
are accounted for. Thanks to satellite transmitters which remained attached
to the cadavers we have located most of the participants.
Unfortunately, bears and cougars have eviscerated the remains
making their exact location difficult to pinpoint.
We regret the inconvenience, however our attorneys wish to state
that legally and duly notarized release forms signed by the participants
render us exempt from culpability and immune from litigation.
Successful survivors (should any be found) will be regaled and properly decorated in the winner’s circle,
In the meantime, we will roast a pig in the fire pit
created by the rescue helicopter’s unfortunate crash landing.
Liquor will be served.
Dress is optional.
(c) Charles Amarack
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